What Were We Thinking?

This morning began with "Grams! Grams! Melanie did something to the DVD player." Hearing the panic and fear in Calleigh's voice I responded immediately. I heard it before I saw it. "Breeeeeee." Stop. "Breeeeeeee." Stop. I couldn't imagine what was going on. So, I get to the DVD player and it doesn't take long to figure out what had happened. We have one of those 400 DVD storage thingimabobbers. Miss Melanie Button Pusher had managed to open the door and pull out about three DVDs and couldn't get them to go all the back way in. So, they were stuck. The sound I heard was the wheel trying to move so the door could shut. Fix was easy-thank the Lord! Calleigh kept saying, "I didn't do anything." and Melanie kept saying, "It's broken and it's all my fault." Oh my gosh, I hear two generations of children flowing through those girls.
The whole thing has me thinking. Why did we get that thing in the first place? It was supposed to be a "Great idea!" We thought, hey it's ok. We can take the time to enter all the titles of the DVD's in there. No prob. Heck, even Nicole offered to help-she's a fast typist. There was just something we forgot about in the organization process. Yep. You guessed it. Calleigh and Melanie. We made several attempts and getting all of the DVD's in there, with titles, and organized (depending on who was doing the organizing hehehe). We would "take a break" and come back. The DVD's would not be the way we left them. In fact there would be tiny finger prints on the back of the DVD's. I think that happened three or four times before we gave up. Ideally, it would have worked great. Reality? Not so much.
Needless to say the DVD player is fixed and the DVD's are messed up again. Peace has returned to home! Riiiiiiiiiiiggggggggghhhhhhhtttttt!

The Land of Duhs

Hey! It has been a long long time. Calleigh has begun kindergarten and seems to love it alot. Hard to believe, I know. Melanie has adjusted to Calleigh being gone in the morning. She actually quite likes it. The toys are all hers to play with. For the most part, she is content as content can be.

I was thinking this morning about some stuff that makes me wonder as a parent how many times I have done this. When I was a youngster probably about Melanie's age-4ish, I was riding a neighbor's big wheel type vehicle made out of metal. One of the neighbor boys ran into me. I had my fingers curled around the edge of the area above the wheel when he ran into me. It cut my fingers and I had to get stitches. My mom said, "You are not going to play on that again." Duh. My own choice was "Darn straight I am not going ride that again." Then again in high school when I was at practice for basketball, I broke my foot. My mom said, "No more basketball for you." Duh. By the time my foot would have healed, basketball would have been over.

Now as a mom and grandma, I really do wonder, how many times I have done this myself. Stating the obvious. And I am sure that my children, if they read this will comment on this will have a whole bunch of "Duh" moments for me. So, girls, here is your opportunity to list away!

Choices

Wow! Time flies! Here it is heading towards the middle of May. Mother's Day has passed and my mom's birthday has passed. It was hard being the first without her. I miss her so much. It's amazing how I can just plug along and suddenly be overtaken with emotions. According to my friends, that eases with time.

I am finally not coughing all the time. I think the two weeks of antibiotics was a really good idea.

There are so many transitions right now. Ashlin is getting ready to graduate from 8th grade and going into high school. That is huge for her and me. She is making so many decisions that are independent and wise. Seeing Shirley for the first time by herself was really big. It was awkward because I had mixed emotions about it, at first. I am glad. I have wanted her to take steps to take steps to take care of her Diabetes. I mean, she doesn't need me like she use to in that respect. She is taking responsibility for her food intake. My role in that is a little tougher. I have to keep my nose to the grindstone to help keep her on her meal plan. It's not fair for me to be pigging out on junk and expect her to eat healthy. So, I have to change my ways a bit, too. She, however, is responsible for her own meal plan. I am trying really hard to buy the fruit and veggies and stuff that she needs to support her. Even tonight, I made the choice to bring home fruit instead of chocolate. I really wanted chocolate. That wouldn't be fair to Ashlin and it really wouldn't be good for me. I made a deliberate choice to bring home fruit. Tomorrow, the girls will benefit from that choice, too.

What is interesting to me is why it is hard to make some of the simple choices. For example, which load of laundry should I do first? What should we have for dinner? Should I go to the drug store first or the grocery store? It seems the simpler the choice the more difficult they are. Crazy, huh? Yeah.

Well, for now, I am choosing to sign off and go to bed. I am tired. All this choosing has worn me out!

The Written Word

One must be careful to write what you mean and clarify what you mean. It can so easily be misunderstood. Emotion can not be seen with words. Tone and attitude can not be be heard or felt with words. Facial expression can not be read with words. The expression, something I awlays thought I was so good at, must be written in such that nothing is left to the imagination especially when it is in terms of responding to a comment someone else makes. It is too easy to misinterpret.

Insignificant, ingored, talked over, non-exsistent

The girls and I were discussing situations yesterday that we find ourselves in on a regular basis. Not with each other, of course, but with others. There are people in our lives that when we are talking to them, they begin speaking to someone else or just interrupt us and begin talking about something completely different. What about talking with someone and they just look right past me? Now, that happens to me alot. I can't stand it. If I do this, please, my friends, tell me. Another thing related to this is in regards to social networks or twitters. I see all kinds of people receive responses yet when I ask a question or post something, nada. I guess in a way, I get jealous and wonder, "Well, what the heck is wrong with me?" It is hard not to feel overlooked or feel left out. Ashlin feels this way with certain people and so does Nicole. It's not like we expect people to bow down to us, no but we don't deserve to be disrespected either. I notice one thing that I do specifically. I DO interrupt people. I am going to work on that. I don't like it. One of my goals is to really focus on what someone is trying to say to me and to bite my tongue if I have to to keep from interrupting them. They have just as much of a story to tell as I do. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Yep. New goal for Kels. I want to try to make each person in my life feel as special as possible. I think the hard part in that would be keepin' it real. I need to get some sleep. I am running on empty. I want to do this. I pray for this to be something that I can do successfully.

New, Renewed, or Rekindled?

So, it starts with the smallest gleam of light. Perhaps the smallest of fluttering. A faint memory of faces matched up with words so powerful that they changed lives. Faces flashing so fast that I can't keep up. The deepest desire to fulfill the calling placed on my life. The call that I KNOW WORKS. People requesting prayer-my heart wanting to stop right then and there and praying. Dear Father God-...I know it's there and I know the flame is being fanned. It is just a matter of time and it will be in full force. And I know what comes with it. A force to be reckoned with. Not by my own might or my own power by that of the Power in the Name of Christ.

Bringing it to the Table

Ok I have two daughters both of which are doing things that are affecting the family in a deep and troubling way. I think they both need to know how their behaviors are doing just that. Maybe it's time to get some family counseling on the schedule.
The other day Ellen Degeneres posted a birck wall with a sign pointing behind them. Behind them was a brick wall with a sign pointing to the one they just came from. That is me right now. I am sure their are some behaviors that I do that are affecting them, too. So, I really do think it is time to bring it to the table. I can't take this anymore. Each one accuses the other using me as their buffer. I can't be that anymore. I am too emotionally drained.